Family Activities

Doing thing together as a family is great. One of Clayton's and Courtney's favourite things always was and is having a family outing/event. Sometimes it's going to the beach, making blessing t-shirts for each other, just going out to eat together.
I've come across a couple of posts that have good ideas too. Try them out.

Grover's idea is here.

And another one here.

Challenged to tell the better story.

I'm not sure where I heard this(can you help me?), but Rob Bell is recorded as giving advice to a parent whose teenage daughter was starting to make a lot of choices that were leading down a bad path. She was "writing" her own story because the story(Parents Faith walk/talk) she was receiving was not very exciting for her.
The advice was give her the better story. The husband went home prayed and started a journey that would involve his family in starting an orphanage in a third world country. The daughter changed her path to her families.
Faith is an adventure - but often we turn it into something else. Reggie Joiner elaborated at Orange leader's forum which is described well by Kenny, check it out here.
Are we living God's story for our lives and will we help our youth catch His story for thir lives?

Consequences for children

This is in Quebec Canada - A 12 yr old girl sues her father(seperated from her mother) to let her go to a graduation trip. The father had grounded her as a punishment. For full report click here

Surely parents have a right to give their children consequences to their actions.

Lots of questions raised in my head -
Where's the father-mother relationship at ? Who supported/encouraged the girl to go to court and why ?
What did the girl do to have the consequence of not be able to go on the trip ?

And relecting on my parenting are the consequences we apply fair and constructive?

Food for thought ...

You've heard of kids having ADD ..

What we need to be addressing is DDD Discipline Deficient Disorder. That I think would be the fruit of the spirit that we call patience and self-control. You might think research 18 yrs ago might not be to helpful these days, but read on anyway...

This article talks about a group of kids put in front of a marshmallow and told that if they wait for the instructor to return they will receive two marshmallows if they haven't taken the one left in front of them.
It turns out the kids who waited for the instructor achieved worldly success when they grew up and the ones that didn't wait didn't. Not sure how scientific or representative it is but it's food for thought.
The rest of the article is if you want to read it.

Faith begins at Home coming to Eastern GTA

Mark Holmen who wrote Faith Begins at Home - the book KIDSZONE gave to all parents last year and was the focus of discussions at FEAST(Families Eating And Sharing Together) through the year.
He's at Calvary Baptist Church, Oshawa on Friday May 2 at 7pm check out the church's website for more details. We will be car pooling so let me know if need a ride or have space. Find directions here.

FamJam This Sunday at 11:00am

With all the positive response from the pilot FamJam back in January, I'm excited to see what God will do with this one. I've had positive feedback from some that were at the first one and how much they enjoyed the presentation as well as the Family Time Package. I've also had some who missed the first one who I guess have spoken to those that were there who have said they're looking forward to coming on Sunday.

This month's virtue is "Conviction - standing for what is right even when others don't."

"What gets asked gets done !"

I've heard this saying many times and often think about the questions I regularly ask. Especially the questions I ask my partners in ministry. But Derek Sanford has caused me to think about the questions I ask my son.

And as a follow-up I have found it to be so important to ask my kids the right
questions at the end of the day. Often parents talk about "how was school," and
"what did you learn." More and more I've been asking my kids "how were you an
example to your friends and teachers today?" and "who did you show Jesus to?"

Thanks Derek.

What questions do you ask your children ?

Keeping hope alive!

On Sunday our parent group (FEAST) discussion was around chapter 5 of Dr Tim Kimmel's Grace-based Parenting. It's focus is for us to lay a foundation of hope in our kids lives.

Childhood is a time we should move our children from dependence on us to
dependence on God. And knowing there will face challenges they can’t handle
but God can.

Tim goes on to give us two things that are needed to raise hope-filled kids

A) They need to see/watch parents who place confidence in the only true
God. When they see parents who say the right words but without much joy, with much fear and lack of love for not yet Christians they get a mixed message.

B) They need to be raised by parents who treat them the way Jesus treats us. With grace.

The importance of this really struck home when I read about 17 young adults in a Welsh town hanging themselves and 3 youth in Northern Ireland

As Jesse Jackson says we need to "Keep hope alive!"

Dr Kimmel goes on to say that childhood is a time we should move our children
from dependence on us to dependence on God. And knowing there will face
challenges they can’t handle but God can.

He also talks about parents being there for their kids so the kids know that
there is someone bigger than there problems. This helps them understand as
they get older that God is bigger than any of our problems.

40 Days of Community

We've started 40 Days of Community (40DoC). I'm excited because this addresses half of the KIDSZONE vision.

Partnering with parents to raise spiritual champions. (Spiritual champions are kids who love God and love people where nothing else matters.).

There is a reason why loving God comes before loving people in the vision. We can only love since we were first loved by God. And we need His love to love one another unselfishly. It is also a challenge to model God's love for our kids too.

Books Books

This week sees the distibution of the new Focus on the Family Book club fliers - similar to the Scholastic ones you're probably receiving from your child's school this week. There is a big difference though. The books available through the book club share a Christian worldview or perspective and will support your child's faith development.
Obviously, Scholastic books give you the opportunity to interact with your child over how the world operates. The Focus on the family books selction will support and reinforce your christian worldview for your children. So it is probably worth looking ito the catalogue. Check it out !

Available this Sunday in KIDSZONE.

FEAST 2008

Our first Families Eating And Sharing Together (FEAST) meeting of the year took place just last Sunday. Having changed the time of the meeting from 6pm to 12:30pm (Straight after second service) we had a 300% increase in attendance! Everybody enjoyed the pizza - my favourite was the grilled chicken on barbeque sauce(instead of tomatoe sauce). Kids went and had fun in the room next to the adults - thank you Elisabeth.

We had a recap of chapter four of "Grace-based parenting" by Dr Tim Kimmel. Then because there were so many parents we broke into two groups for discussion and prayer.
at the conclusion of the discussion we want onto our customary family activity - this time it was a bit different becasue the kids and parents were seperated for the "family" activity ! The kids were given blank white baseball caps to write blessings and things the kdis saw in their parents. The parents got white t-shirts to write blessings and affirmation of their kids on. afetr 30 minutes we all came togther and exchanged our blessings it was a blast to see the kids reactions.

Soda - be careful !

I came accross an article that explains what happens to your body when you drink soda. It makes interesting reading and might even change your drinking habits or what you let your chidlren drink ! Check it out here.

Virtual Worlds for kids taking off

It's something I've noticed in Clayton(my 8 yr old champ) recently. He's much more into online stuff. It's gone from the Kinder eggs -secret code for a game online, now it's a community where he designs his character and walks around a virtual world doing things like "say Hi!" "pat someone on the back!" "Hug someone !" "Challenge someone to a game !"
The computer is in our living room and I regularly look over his shoulder. We don't let him chat with anyone online.
I am wondering if this desire for virtual world and community is related to how my son sees himself and even his Spiritual-esteem.
As I wonder I'm asking myself how can I help him more to know who he is in Christ ? And if he catches his faith from his parents - how can I reflect who I am in Christ better ?

False Esteem

Craig Groeschel has some amazing spiritual insights. His insight on "Self-esteem" is no exception. The world tries to improve our children's self esteem with programs. And without God in the picture it seems to be a logical thing to do. But it seems pretty empty when God is. Are we as parents taking care foster our own Spiritual-Esteem so our children will catch it because of Him in us. Here's Craig's latest offering on Self-Spiritual esteem (and links to his previous insights -well worth checking out).

False-Esteem: I do good things, therefore God accepts me.
Spiritual-Esteem: I’m accepted because of what Jesus did for me, therefore I do good things.

False-Esteem: I try hard, so God loves me.
Spiritual-Esteem: God loves me radically, so I try hard.

False-Esteem: I produce, therefore God is pleased.
Spiritual-Esteem: God is pleased with me in Christ, therefore He produces through me.

False-Esteem: Self is the center.
Spiritual-Esteem: God is the center.



Spiritual-Esteem 1 (of 4)
Spiritual-Esteem 2 (of 4)
Spiritual-Esteem 3 (of 4)
Spiritual Esteem 4 (of 4)

FEAST III - November 18

All parents are invited to come together for Families Eating And Sharing Together (FEAST) this Sunday. We'll eat together in Families starting at 6pm. At 6:30 the kids will go to the gym for games while the parents have a smallg roup around chapter three of Grace Based Parenting.
We'll round off hhe evening with a family activity followed by ice cream !
Bring parent friend.

ADD and troubled Kindergarteners - There is hope!

I know that these kind of behaviours can way heavy on parent's hearts. Running an after school program in Montreal I saw this first hand. But according to some two research papers identified by Keith Johnson, There is hope for those children:

One concluded that kindergartners who are identified as troubled do as well academically as their peers in elementary school. The other found that children with attention deficit disorders suffer primarily from a delay in brain development, not from a deficit or flaw.

Do you know what you're kids are watching ?

I believe a child gets most of their discernment directly from God and their parents. Young eyes and hearts are vulnerable until they learn discernment. From an early age we have told Clayton that there are people that want to bad things to you and that there are bad things that you shouldn't see on TV.
Opportunities do come up from time to time to address this. You should be on the look out for one coming to a theatre near you December 7. The movie Golden Compass is based on a trilogy that the author is hoping will land under some Christmas trees this year. He's reckoning on kids getting hyped by the movie to bug their parents into buying the books as Christmas presents.
The heroes goal in the trilogy is too kill "God." Apparently it is a kind of anti-Narnia series.

If I find more info I'll edit this blog

Families - You gotta eat together !!!!

It is sooooooooooo easy to sit your kids in front of the TV and give them TV dinner. Let's go the extra mile and have them switch it off and eat together ! It will be worth it.

Thanks to Keithdj1 for this reminder

Dr. Doherty wrote a book Putting Family First: Successful Strategies for Reclaiming Family Life in A Hurry Up World. Doherty, W.J. (2002)
Doherty stated: “For young children, meal time at home is a stronger predictor of academic achievement and psychological adjustment than time spent in any of the following activities: school, studying, sports, church/religious activities, or art activities. For teens, having regular dinners with parents is a strong predictor of academic success, psychological adjustment, and lower rates of alcohol use, drug use, early sexual behavior, eating disorders, and risk for suicide.”

More Barna - what

Gleanings from Barna's latest book:-
In chapter two he lays out what his research has found to be the conditions for success. He works from a model of a coach and offers 5 tips from his research.

• The depth of the relationship forged with your child will determine your impact.
• Parents needed to completely embrace the outcomes they desire in their child.
• Impact happens "in the moment."
• Great coaches communicate well.
• Coaches need to have plan to reach the goal.

Summing up I would say that it doesn't just happen but is a parent-led identified process going somewhere !

A reminder - you can find two copies of this book in the Adulyt Library at FAC.

Taking it home - grades 1-2

I really enjoyed sitting down with the parents of grade 1 and 2 children. We gave out a great resource. A beach ball - not a regular beach ball - but a beach ball that parents could use with their children to help reinforce either the memory verse or Bible Story that the kids had had in KIDSZONE Sunday.
The ball has questions on it relating to either the story or memory verse. The parents and kids would throw the ball between each other. Wherever the person's right thumb touched the ball when it was caught that's the question the ball holder would answer about the question.

Some parents missed out so we'll probably run another "Taking it Home" special for them at a later date.

"Taking it Home" for grades 3-4 is scheduled for May 20 and grades 5-6 on May 27.